can spouse touch life ins left to children?

Message Author
ampm-bookmark
delicious-small Add to delicious
yahoomyweb-small Add to YahooMyWeb
blinklist-small Add to BlinkList
PostPosted: Mon May 25, 2009 12:52 pm   Post subject: insurance  

AGAIN.....my son is a Minor. According to Military guidelines, a Minor CANNOT be 'Primary' Beneficiary. When my son turns 18, I can change him to 'Primary'. There IS nothing to "fix".

sdchargersfan
Senior member
Leave a quick message

sdchargersfan

Joined: 21 Aug 2007
Posts: 2052


5.14 Dollars($)

PostPosted: Mon May 25, 2009 2:38 pm   Post subject:   

There is a difference that you are completely missing. It does not matter even if you're correct that your son can't be a primary beneficiary.



Let me ask you a "yes" or "no" question. Do you understand that if your friend is your primary beneficiary, when you die, 100% of that money belongs to your friend to do with what she pleases?



Here is another "yes" or "no" question? Do you want the money to all go to your friend?



Here is another one. Do you understand that there is nothing to fix only if you don't care about anything going to your son?



Assuming that you are correct that they won't accept your son as primary beneficiary, let me give you two fixes to this problem that you think doesn't need fixed.



1) Change your primary beneficiary from your friend. Your new beneficiary should be "trustee under the will of the insured". Ask an attorney for the specific wording. Your friend can be the trustee. This is VERY DIFFERENT than having her be the named primary beneficiary.



2) Change your primary beneficiary to somebody who is currently dead (One of your parents, a grandparent, etc.). At your death, the money will go to the contingent. (This is why it's silly to allow a contingent beneficiary to be something that a primary beneficiary can't be.)



You are acting as if the military wants their members to screw their children. That is what you are doing if you die today.



THE ALTERNATIVE TO NAMING YOUR CHILD AS A PRIMARY BENEFICIARY IS NOT NAMING A TRUSTED FRIEND. Sorry to put it this way, but what you are doing is one of the dumbest things that I have ever seen anybody do in 20 years as an advisor.

InsuranceExpert
Senior member
Leave a quick message



Joined: 05 Apr 2009
Posts: 662


142.74 Dollars($)

PostPosted: Mon May 25, 2009 11:12 pm   Post subject:   

SDcharger....This whole thread has prompted me to do some research just out of curiousity because of the controversy.



I went to the SGLI site...for military life insurance. Yes, it does say in fact that the military will not write out a check to a minor. But it highly emphasizes the need for a revokable living trust to be set up. With the minor child as beneficiary and a trustee as the manager of your children's funds.



I have just purchased NOLO's forms for establishing trusts and will be seeing a public notary and dragging my witnesses along with me to ASSURE that my children will get the money that I am designating for them.



I have outlined provisions for their welfare. My 17 year old will receive all of her funds if she is older than 18 upon my death.



My currently 13 year old will have expenses taken care of until he reaches 18 if I am deceased at which point he will be given the balance.



I know you trust your friend, but the reason I am doing this is because I trust no one...even their father who loves them to manage that money correctly. He will get enough to cover the roof over my son's head so that he always has a home, and his father will be in charge of providing everything else.



No one here is asking you to do anything drastic. Just change your beneficiary to your son and then set up a trust. Your strong opposition to this leads me to believe though that you have odd motives for being so combative. Perhaps this friend is more than a friend and you are afraid of offending them? I don't know, but they would never have to know that you changed the beneficiary until after you died. At which point who cares if they are offended. If you set up the trust correctly, your son will be assured of getting his money.



I am surely not an insurance expert, but I read all of the SGLI info. You can name a minor, but the check will be made out to the trust designated for that child, if you have established one. Otherwise the courts will decide who will be the guardian of the account. I also read that the reason this is often misunderstood is because the clerks in different military offices do not fully understand the accepted lingo for leaving your child the funds within a trust situation. I know this is an incredibly long link, but it is just one of the many I found in my research.



http://74.125.47.132/search?q=cache:UqJc2C9jt3sJ:www.lejeune.usmc.mil/ legal/Testamentary%2520Life%2520Insurance%2520Trust%2520for%2520Minors %2520Rev%2520080916.doc+can+a+minor+be+named+beneficiary+on+a+military +life+insurance&cd=1&hl=en&ct=clnk&gl=us&client=firefox-a



Cheers, P&C



_________________

I arise in the morning torn between a desire to improve the world and a desire to enjoy the world. This makes it hard to plan the day.

E. B. White
picklesandchampagne
New member
Leave a quick message



Joined: 20 May 2009
Posts: 18


10.19 Dollars($)

PostPosted: Mon May 25, 2009 11:36 pm   Post subject:   

Good job, picklesandchampagne. The link is backing up everything that we have been telling SDCharger, including the fact that the minor can be the beneficiary. It just isn't smart to name them instead of the trust because the owner then can't control who will be controlling Junior's money.



Hopefully, since you linked the SGLI info, she'll finally realize that she is doing this incorrectly.



(I hope that she has an open mind instead of digging in her heels.)

InsuranceExpert
Senior member
Leave a quick message



Joined: 05 Apr 2009
Posts: 662


142.74 Dollars($)

PostPosted: Tue May 26, 2009 1:12 am   Post subject:   

Thanks IE. I think we all have her best interests in mind. It is such a simple change to make. It sickens me to think that someone would misspend what little I have to leave my children. i certainly would hate to see it happen to anyone else either.



_________________

I arise in the morning torn between a desire to improve the world and a desire to enjoy the world. This makes it hard to plan the day.

E. B. White
picklesandchampagne
New member
Leave a quick message



Joined: 20 May 2009
Posts: 18


10.19 Dollars($)

PostPosted: Tue May 26, 2009 3:40 am   Post subject: insurance  

I KNOW what the SGLI says...thanks anyway ( yeah, right). I refuse to keep repeating myself. I think it's time people 'move on'........don't you think?

sdchargersfan
Senior member
Leave a quick message

sdchargersfan

Joined: 21 Aug 2007
Posts: 2052


5.14 Dollars($)

PostPosted: Tue May 26, 2009 3:56 am   Post subject:   

Quote:
I know what a the SGLI says. I think I'm done dealing with ignorant people.




Unfortunately, it is not the people that are trying to help you that are being ignorant. You have received some great advice from insurance experts with 20+ years of experience...even experience specifically regarding your circumstances. It is your choice whether or not to take heed and make sure that your son and his best interests are taken care of.



Will it be very uncomfortable to explain to your friend? NO...at least it shouldn't be. It is not that you do not trust her...in fact you would still be putting your faith in her as the trustee. If she is truly the right person for the position (which only you can judge)...then she will wholeheartedly agree that you both need to ensure that everything is done properly and without room for errors or mishaps.



I am absolutely positive (although I could be pleasantly surprised) that you are not going to post on here and say that you will at least check into the matter and make sure you haven't received misinformation. However, I do hope that a little nagging thought in your mind will make you call a lawyer and talk with someone that is trained in these matters.



AFTER ALL, isn't the welfare and wellbeing of your son worth it? You don't owe anyone here an explanation nor will you ever have to apologize to anyone here for not taking their advice. This is all about your son and I know that you want to do what's best for him. Keep in mind that the clerks only deal with their personal experiences and what they have learned...They do not have any insurance training and are NOT the best people to ask (although I'm sure this is not what you are relying on knowing you!!)



I have problems with pharmacists and staff at physician's offices advising my clients against health programs, medicare supplements, etc. I had a billing clerk tell a medicare client that they did accept medicare, but that they did not accept the supplement from AARP because AARP was not an insurance company. (Side note...the AARP supplement is done through United Health Care ... which is an insurance company) As a result, the client cancelled her supplement and now can't get another one because of her poor medical history.



People mean well, and normally think that they understand things that may actually be beyond their comprehension and level of understanding. Nobody would intentionally steer you wrong, or at least I hope they wouldn't. I've read enough of your posts to know that you will do your homework, and whether you post it here or not...you'll make sure that you are doing the best thing for your son.



If you do need any help (I have forms for trusts / wills / etc. and do estate planning and trust formations)...feel free to PM me and I'll send you whatever I can to help you. It will be confidential of course.
ChrisBantly
Senior member
Leave a quick message



Joined: 11 Mar 2009
Posts: 381

Location: Upstate SC
1.16 Dollars($)

PostPosted: Tue May 26, 2009 4:01 am   Post subject: insurance  

Yeah,..ok.

sdchargersfan
Senior member
Leave a quick message

sdchargersfan

Joined: 21 Aug 2007
Posts: 2052


5.14 Dollars($)

PostPosted: Tue May 26, 2009 11:53 am   Post subject:   

Quote:
I KNOW what the SGLI says...thanks anyway ( yeah, right).
there is no need what so ever to be ugly to pickels, she came here for information, about her own ins and children...through that she has given up her time to find links etc. to assist you.....she's not an agent, she's just like you a consumer...but a consumer who took HER time to find some important links for your consideration....i can't find where she has said one cross word to you...i'm disappointed in your rudeness to 'her'..

++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++



Leave her alone, let her do what she wants, take advise from non-licensed insurance experts hopefully she won't die anyway till her boy is over eighteen...she has the information, (as does anyone else in similar circumstances that is surfing), shamefully it's brought out ugliness directed toward innocent bystanders, that only wanted to help, and have not said a cross word (ie, pickels, me, chris etc)....there's just no need for that....



She wants everyone to forget it...'move on' I for one will do the same..but will keep an eye on the 'tone'.


_________________

"Never, never be afraid to do what's right, especially if the well being of a person or animal is at stake. Society's punishments are small compared to the wounds we inflict on our soul when we look the other way." Martin Luther King Jr.
Lori
Forum Expert
Leave a quick message

Lori
Forum Expert

Joined: 10 Sep 2007
Posts: 8080

Location: Missouri
287.93 Dollars($)

PostPosted: Tue May 26, 2009 12:56 pm   Post subject:   

thanks Lori. I will move on as well....like the old saying goes..."You can lead a horse to water...."



Now if the insurance industry could just create some "marriage" insurance I would have a whole new subject to talk about! LOLOL Smile



_________________

I arise in the morning torn between a desire to improve the world and a desire to enjoy the world. This makes it hard to plan the day.

E. B. White
picklesandchampagne
New member
Leave a quick message



Joined: 20 May 2009
Posts: 18


10.19 Dollars($)

PostPosted: Wed May 27, 2009 6:49 am   Post subject:   

Quote:
Nobody would intentionally steer you wrong, or at least I hope they wouldn't.




Chris, I think we have done what we could do. Now, it upon her to decide what she wants to do with it. We can only suggest but can't direct anyone.



However, I think we have got distracted from the original post. Hopefully Pickle has find our information/suggestions useful for her.



I'd like to thank Pickle for sticking with us and investing her time in helping others as well. She displays the true spirit of the community.



~Jeremy
JeremyHolter
Senior member
Leave a quick message

Jeremy Holter

Joined: 06 Jun 2007
Posts: 1185


210.40 Dollars($)

PostPosted: Wed May 27, 2009 9:49 am   Post subject:   

I couldn't agree more Jeremy...pickle,

Quote:
Now if the insurance industry could just create some "marriage" insurance I would have a whole new subject to talk about! LOLOL
the way you did your rearch I'm sure you would be a great help in some other threads as well ... re: ''marriage'' ins... I think they call that a pre-nup... Wink I got married too young though to think about marrying for money, ... Wink


_________________

"Never, never be afraid to do what's right, especially if the well being of a person or animal is at stake. Society's punishments are small compared to the wounds we inflict on our soul when we look the other way." Martin Luther King Jr.
Lori
Forum Expert
Leave a quick message

Lori
Forum Expert

Joined: 10 Sep 2007
Posts: 8080

Location: Missouri
287.93 Dollars($)

PostPosted: Wed May 27, 2009 12:37 pm   Post subject:   

Thanks to Jeremy and to Lori...LOL on the pre-nup!



I am a research fanatic. I have a personal concierge business and one of my strongest selling points is doing research for my clients. Sometimes I am good at finding the info, but don't always understand what I have found. So to answer Jeremy's question...yes, the forum was great at helping me understand what I found but didn't understand!



Lori....I will poke around and if I find anything I can be of help with I will certainly put in my two cents.



P&C



_________________

I arise in the morning torn between a desire to improve the world and a desire to enjoy the world. This makes it hard to plan the day.

E. B. White
picklesandchampagne
New member
Leave a quick message



Joined: 20 May 2009
Posts: 18


10.19 Dollars($)

Quick Reply
Your Name
Subject
Message body
All times are GMT
 Previous  1, 2, 3, 4
Page 4 of 4


Get a Quote
Ask Community Experts

flash plugin

Quick Links

Must See

Community

Hot topics in forums

Latest in blogs

AmPmInsure on Facebook



Page loaded in 0.227 seconds.